Can I do it again?

Sitting, sitting here in Lund. Is that the rest of my life? We got a small apartment on the ground floor a year ago, just before I was forced to start using rollator. Now I am dead scared of going back to the crutch! It is so much simpler moving around with that stick, but it feels extremely unstable, like falling all the time - it has stopped me from going to the dentist all this time as she has her clinic in an old house with a small staircase up from a complicated entrance, so my teeth are in no good shape, but now finally beginning of April my wife, Yui, will come along. She is a strong farmer girl and can easily bring up the rollator there. I can get up just with a good handhold.

I have had ulcers in my feet since last time in Samui - Yui discovered it after coming back to Sweden, I was there alone but would not dare that again. It started with a small hole, then two both big ones on both feet, first on the left, one month free then it jumped over to the right, now only a small hole left on the right, with some luck and good care it should be more or less gone coming summer, when we plan to go for a month, only to her village, no travel around, and anyway - it is the only thing we barely got money for. She has studied on her master in Malmö this year and it IS more costly than just taking the bike to the university here in Lund.

So it is crucial she gets a job after summer. Next January I am a real retiree and the money I will get will be lower, I have not bothered about the exact details as I cannot do anything about it. When I left my last job at the Provincial Archives here in town, we got a multimedia job, that was successful enough to render an article in the biggest paper here in Southern Sweden about it, but no follow-up, and soon that director died, and none of the bunch among those deciding there is innovative at all. The old director and I had several projects planned.

I just spent some nightly hours looking at old articles on this blog and dreamed, sigh. I feel like I could not do a thing, have hardly moved the last two years since we were in Thailand last, by necessity I must move more when we go there. So we will try to go there this year during appr. July. Unless Yui gets a response from all her job applications.

Some weeks later, April 12.

Strange, my brain does not feel too senile, it is very active. But also getting more contemplative, I like to travel to certain places, not just travel randomly, big areas I am not gonna cover in this body. Europe - ah well, our father taught us to appreciate that, he took our little Volkswagen already in 1955 driving all the way down to Rome, not too common in those days! I joined family on holidays until 1970, when I first went myself, hitch-hiking to Spain.

So I am also thinking more of why I enjoy travelling. Enjoy sitting with my laptop in a nice warm surrounding with nice people, nice food and no snow! Without comparing me, I think of the famous Arthur C. Clarke, he with lots of famous books of Science Fiction AND Science ideas, he was the one who came up with the idea of communication satellies that the modern world couldn't do without. And he lived his last decades in his retreat in Sri Lanka.

I wonder if a month's stay in the little jungle village will be interesting, boring, rewarding - depends on if I activate myself a bit. Take a short walk every day, what you see is simply two houses along a small country road, go down in this blog and look at this place.

I can be there as the internet is decent enough to use, no down- or uploading of videos and films and music.........   I use a small plug looking as a big USB memory stick, that picks up Wifi. If I had stayed longer and we had money, it is rather cheap to put up an antenna where several people then can use the Wifi.

What the future will give - I can only say thank you for what I experience, I do not really feel it is time to go yet in spite of 55 years of diabetes, half the time with bad kidneys. How bad - well, in a few years I might start to need dialysis, and then - we will take one step at a time.

Now only to wait, if my health is not worse and Yui does not get summer job, we are off during July, then she has to look for a qualified job fulltime. She has just taken a one year magister course in Malmö in Interactive Design, working on her final thesis now, and the best would be if she got into one of the company projects where they do research. We will see.